I’d like to start by saying that security from terrorists is high on the list of safety for our country, and many have been American citizens. Some say it’s not fair to compare DT with Hitler but the similarities are becoming more real and hard to deny. He’s tried to hush the press, even when they’ve only just printed his quotes…his very own words!! He is a liar…continually saying he never said this or that even though he’s on video saying them. Unless they totally agree with what he has to say he wants them hushed and hurls personal attacks….and that includes also others not in the press.
He’s a narcissist, caring WAY too much about how others see him and things said about him, even using his time at the CIA for his self-serving ways. He has cut off the voice of the EPA and other agencies, shutting down their Twitter accounts, if you can imagine that! Even though he is doing what he had promised his followers, he has signed way too many executive orders in too short a time frame, not taking the time to think things out, how to implement them and the consequences.
Even though I did NOT vote for him I still hoped he’d be successful because I love our country. He is surrounding himself with people like the antisemite Bannon amongst others….appointing people to his cabinet who know nothing about the job. That’s when I quickly starting losing hope.
So now he implemented detaining those from certain countries even those with legal visas, greencards and a family deeply vetted for 2 years and allowed to come to the US, while they were in midair!! Homeland Security and the airlines have said that they did not know how to implement it. Don’t you think a reasonable person would have met with these agencies on how best to formulate a plan and get their feedback?? Not him, because he’s unreasonable and doesn’t need feedback because ‘he has a good brain’, ‘the best brain’, ‘the biggest brain’!! A FEDERAL judge put a stop to the detainment and DT”s administration said NO, the airports are to do as he said and detain. This is utter chaos!
DT is a very dangerous man and setting a very dangerous precedent, leading me to believe it’s only the beginning….possibly the beginning of the end of the America I love and know, the freedoms and democracy I am grateful for and the lack of the ‘fabric of America’ to be accepting to all and especially of those in need! #werestillhere #voicesloudandclear #weretheresistance #equalityfor all
It has probably been almost a year since I’ve written on here. This is a draft I started quite awhile ago and decided to finally finish. I love to write. It makes me feel productive, is self healing and touches a creative side that is positive and makes me feel good.
It feels as if I’ve taken steps backwards. I thought I had made more progress….or am I just being impatient? Have you ever felt as if you were finally making progress in life only to wake up one day with high anxiety, feeling very down and questioning everything? I’ve been trying to figure out why, for the past several months, I’ve been feeling this way. What has changed? Meditating has helped some with my anxiety but not with choosing my path. I’m discouraged and feel as if I’m barely keeping my head above drowning. I refuse to give in to it, although I must admit I’ve come close. I thank God for my family, my sons and sister and a couple of wonderful friends. I’m mindful to always try to find the positive in every day and daily situations but, still, I awaken to this feeling of dread. So many things have happened in a relatively short period of time.
It’s a feeling that I just haven’t been able to shake. There are many issues; not just the everyday annoyances but big issues that seem to consume me. It’s so hard to stay positive when you have to make the best of a bad situation and can’t walk away….just yet anyway….and honestly probably not for quite a while. You can’t start anew, leaving the past in the past and yet live in the same house, in a marriage that’s been long over and even that isn’t mutually agreed upon.
I feel as if I am merely a spectator and not a real participant in life… just existing. Don’t get me wrong, I am grateful everyday to awaken and take a breath. There are others who have it much, much worse than I do.
There has to be a plan. Something I can sink my teeth into. I need a project and a purpose and then figure a way to get there. However, I first have to decide what it is that I’d like to do. Something I want to do and can earn a living at. Maybe I’ll be taking classes or starting an entry level job that will be willing to train me. Still, I can’t do that until I’ve decided what it is I’m supposed to or want to do. I have been searching jobs for some time with no success. Sometimes I worry that at 58 I am too old. There are feelings of frustration, anxiety, boredom, impatience, disappointment, and I’m simply drained emotionally and mentally. Although I feel as if life is passing me by, still I wake up trying to be hopeful and continually push against the uncomfortable; almost debilitating feelings of anxiety.
Happiness would be a great place to be………..right now I’d happily settle for contentment.
Watching the water can be so peaceful and relaxing, especially on a beautiful day!
Home is where my spirit is at peace.